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I’ve probably been on dates and disclosed my status to over 100 people in the last five years (#noshame).I disclose face to face with 95 percent of my suitors and I’ve had a wide variety of responses; good, bad, and strange.I’ve found some really cool people both from real life and on Tinder, and I’ve attempted to find a heterosexual man who’s also HIV-positive on and through Facebook.I’ve met some really great guys this way, but it turns out the dating pool for HIV-positive men who are interested in women is spread thin and wide. I even dated a girl for a little bit, and although I’m more attracted to men, I’m not ruling that out for my future. I’ve had relationships where HIV wasn’t a huge deal at all, and others where it was the major reason for break up.Here’s the abridged version of my story; I contracted HIV in 2010 from an ex-boyfriend who was dishonest and disloyal.He has no idea where, when, or from whom he contracted the virus, but it’s likely he had it before we started having sex.
I was scared that I wasn’t ever going to be able to get laid again.
I was angry and devastated, but the fact is that I didn’t demand to get tested together before he and I stopped using condoms, even though I knew better.
I took my personal responsibility and tried to make the relationship work for a while.
Through all of the dating blunders and painful break ups, I remain positive and optimistic.
I go into every first date being excited to get to know the human in front of me, feeling hopeful that perhaps this one will be a good fit.
More often than not, though, guys will say “Wow, you’re such an amazing person” right after disclosure, and then disappear.