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(Host Intro) Let's meet contestant #1 He's a schitzophrenic serial killer clown Who says women love his sexy smile. Tell me what you'd do to make that first impression really stay.
(Sharon) Contestant #1, I believe first impressions last forever, So let's say you were to come over to my parents' house And have dinner with me and my family.
But if I did, I'd probably show you that I care, By takin all these other motha fuckers outta here!
Well it sounds like contestant number two Is just over-flowing with sensitivity, Sharon It's a tough choice so far Sharon, let's have your last question and See which one is going to win the rights to your neden Okay, if we were at a dance club, and you both noticed me at thesame time.
Tell me, how would you each get my attention, and what wouldyour pick up line be? CONTESTANT NUMBER 2Okay, first I'd slide up to the bar And tell you that I can't believe how f*cking fat you are I'd tell that I like the way you make your titties shake And if you lost a little weight, you'd look like Rikki Lake!
, but I doubt it I'd probably just show up naked like I always do And look your momma in the eye and tell her, "fuck you!
" Hurry up bitch, I'm hungry, I smell spaghetti I'd pinch her loopy ass and tell her, "Get the food ready!
CONTESTANT NUMBER 2First thing, I could never love you You sound like a richie-bitch, yo, F*CK YOU!!!